[volepaw] , APPRENTICE OF thunderclan<3

[[teh I N S A N I T Y ;;]

---

name...
volepaw

gender...
male - a tom

age...
six moons

group...
thunderclan

rank...
apprentice

reference...
a light ginger tom with darker ginger stripes, along with amber eyes

appearance...
Volepaw looks like...
Volepaw has very, very light ginger fur with darker stripes on it. Not too light nor dark, just the perfect amount of ginger in his fur. His fur doesn't turn to a flame-like color when sunlight hits, but the fur turns brighter when the sun hits it. There are different shades of ginger on his body. The stripes are a dark, dark ginger and pretty much stand out. His fur is short, making him easily freeze in the leaf-bare. His fur is soft like a kit's fur and is a bit messy. His short fur makes travel easier and makes him cleaner, because if he gets leaves on his pelt or dirt, it would be easy for him to groom his fur. His eyes are an amber color, almost like an owl's eyes. They have good eyesight, since his eyes could see some things at very far distances. He is not small nor big, just medium-sized, pretty much the average size for a tom. He is slender, but has muscle on some parts of his body. His paws and ears are medium-sized, along with his tail which is fluffy at the tip and is medium-length. His claws are sharp, yet kind of short. Same with his teeth, except they're medium-length and are sharper than his claws.

personality...
Volepaw acts like...
A true warrior to heart, this tom here is brave and loyal to his Clan. Volepaw is always gaining something to become the best warrior ever! He is not just brave and loyal and apprentice-like, but also sly and clever. He has a mind full of sneakiness and dangers. He has the personality of Tom Sawyer. Calm, sneaky, clever and complicated. He always needs a complicated answer for a simple question, a simple answer for a complicated question. It's like that to him, like if you ask him what's 1 plus 1, he'll then explain the whole thing of getting the answer and so on. Yet Volepaw doesn't know math (since he's a cat). Whenever he's having an adventure or so, he always has a complicated plan to do it. Volepaw doesn't like simple plans that would end the adventure in one second. No, it would just make the whole adventure boring and pointless. His plans are very unusual and surprising, mostly it would be impressing and amazing. If you just have a good, easy plan to get some prisoner out -for example- he's gonna kill you. Whenever something huge goes on, he doesn't go with the crowd and gawk at the situation. No, this apprentice here is cool and calm, collected in every piece. You almost just can't get him angry. Volepaw has a side of flirtatiousness, and a big one at that! He impresses some she-cats. Yet, his flirty side is only for amusement and entertainment. He doesn't use it to get mates. No, this tom here goes solo and isn't very much interested in she-cats. Yet he likes to flirt a lot and get other she-cats jealous and fight over him. It's a habit, he says, all toms do that. A fun and very active tom, he is always ready on the go! With a spark of humor, of course. Volepaw never leaves his fans bored without some of his very ironic actions. He doesn't like to follow the Warrior Code, always in trouble with his friend, Mistypaw. He likes breaking some typical, very small rules that any apprentice would do, but he would like to go extreme [like falling in love with another cat, but that may not happen], even though his mother is watching him like a hawk. Volepaw is sometimes selfish, like if he caught a piece of prey and you were hungry and wanted to share with him, he may say that he may go hungry and die.

history...
Volepaw has a history of...
As the sun dims in the nursery, a pale-faced queen was laying on the ground, waiting for her kits to come. Blood pounded in her small face, scared of what might happen. What if she dies in childbirth? What if she dies after giving birth? Flexing her claws, her light green-yellow eyes show happiness yet fear. Her sister, Dustflight, died in childbirth, leaving two motherless kits. Of course, Honeywhisker offered to take in the kits, since its her sister's, but she couldn't take care of them since she doesn't have milk yet. Another queen took the kits and promised that when she gives birth, she will give the kits back to her. Sighing, she put her head on her paws, bored.

A rip was heard in the golden-brown belly, screeching throughout the nursery. Honeywhisker's eyes widened as she felt non stopping pain fill inside her body, shaking her. With a yowl, she began to fight.

example one;
Born to Honeywhisker and Owlcry, he was the only one in the litter. You may probably think this is one of those 'lonely-kithood' stories and then the kitty turns into a depressed cat, but you're wrong. With his motherless cousins on his side, they were like his siblings. They were called Hawkkit and Berrykit, a tom and a girl. They played with each other and got along, like a family. Of course, they are family. Volekit never thought that there was some kits that didn't have a family, that is, until he knew Mistykit's longing for affection and family. Mistykit was a she-cat who lost her mother and siblings shortly after her birth. Her sister, Willowkit, died after birth and her brother, Treekit, died at the age of almost three moons [same as Mistykit] by eating deathberries. Her mother Appleleaf died from greencough which came two days later after Treekit's death. Only Appleleaf and an elder named Graystorm died from the unexpected greencough. Her father was unknown. The leader declared that Mistykit would be taken in by Honeywhisker, and that's how Volekit and Mistykit met each other. Volekit and Mistykit became very close friends, turning into best friends.

They led very many misadventures, some epic and some for no reason. On each adventure, they either find something new in their lives or just nothing at all. These adventures caused the Clan some trouble, but Volekit and Mistykit didn't really care.

When they reached 6 moons, they both became apprentices, along with Volepaw's cousins.

example two;
He became Volepaw and his mentor is now Darkspots. And is currently working on a plan for his and Mistypaw's next possibly-gonna-fail adventure.

acquaintances...
MAM - Honeywhisker - golden-brown she-cat with light green-yellow eyes, living
PA - Owlcry - dark brown tabby tom with amber eyes, living
FRIEND - Mistypaw - silver-black Somali she-cat with greenish blue eyes, living
AUNTIE - Dustflight - gray-brown she-cat with amber eyes, dead
C'ZIN - Hawkpaw - brown tabby tom with amber eyes and white paws, living
C'ZIN - Berrypaw - gray-brown she-cat with green eyes, living
TEA'HER - Darkspots - white tom with black spots and golden eyes, living

notes...
Nothing really. Just gonna need some people to play Volepaw's best friend, mentor, mother, and cousins. Also got this bio from another site I went on and Volepaw's best friend was RPed by another RPer, so yeah..

[hazel :D]

APPEARANCE ISSUES:
VolePaw -- you say Volepaw in the rest of the bio.
the perfect amount of ginger fur -- perfect amount of ginger fur, or the perfect amount of ginger in his fur?
give off a little glow -- fur can glow?
his eyes could see some things at very far distances -- then doesn't that mean he has good eyesight?
medium-lengthen -- I think you mean medium-length. (you say this twice)
more sharper -- this should just be "sharper."

PERSONALITY ISSUES:
apprentice-like -- not all apprentices are really ambitious.
gets almost everyone agitated and impressed -- powerplay.
can make any she-cat drool over him and make them declare their love -- powerplay.

[[teh I N S A N I T Y ;;]

Edited.

[Darkiez =D]

RANK

You may keep him as an apprentice, but please seek permission for a rank marked [np] in the future.

APPEARANCE

A bit messy & makes him cleaner -- I get what you're saying...I think. Clarify?

PERSONALITY

Sometimes breaking a big one -- Like what? I can imagine him breaking small ones, but not big ones...

Also, while he does have a couple flaws and quirks, could you add in another quirk/flaw? Right now he seems like a stereotypical apprentice, just a bit calmer. Not hugely flawed/quirked.

HISTORY

After or so -- Eh...what?

Along with Volepaw's cousins -- Aren't they older? o.o

Also, it's not really clear who Mistykit is, why Volekit had to beg Honeywhisker to take her in, etc.

NOTES

You probably already figured this out, but I'll say it anyway. xP When Volepaw's accepted, you should prob'ly post in the homeless shelter board. ^^

Very good bio! Can't wait to see him in RP.

[[teh I N S A N I T Y ;;]

Uh, I don't see where it says, 'After or so,' in the history.. May you tell me where it is?

[Darkiez =D]

This line: What if she dies in childbirth? What if she dies after or so?

[[teh I N S A N I T Y ;;]

Edited.

[Darkiez =D]

Just 3 things this time. ^^



HISTORY

Appleleaf committing suicide is...not going to be permitted. Suicide is an EXTREMELY mature concept, and though I'm sure we're all mature here, I just don't want any characters going off and killing themselves.

Also...I imagine that the leader would demand that Mistykit be taken in by everyone in the nursery as a friend/sibling, and treated properly.

ACQUAINTANCES

Hawkpaw's eyes -- Non-white cats with blue eyes are banned, as they are rare and we already have a couple.

[[teh I N S A N I T Y ;;]

Edited.

[Darkiez =D]

Thanks for being patient with all the declines I gave you ~